Exercise mats, dumbbells, tension bands, and a scale. As Johnny Carson’s Carnac the Magnificent would quip, “Name four things that a middle -aged man uses less frequently than Viagra.”
Seven months ago we converted a bedroom into an exercise studio, complete with a bench press/ squats stand anchored into the floor. This was so my bride could do exercise with a tension band and kickbox with a weight bag. But then I got tired of being a fat, old man. First I got kick-started (pardon the pun) by her enthusiasm, and illness requiring surgery I’ve already written about ad nauseum. We started on the keto diet which over time will allow you to drop a lot of weight by eating fish, baked chicken (skinless), some beef, but cheese, butter and cream are good. No breads, cereals, fruit, sugars, or processed anything.
The bad part of course, except for other “keto kooks” like you, people stop inviting you over. You fear going anywhere to eat because NOTHING fits your restricted diet except bacon and eggs. Not that bacon is bad, mind you. I dropped thirty pounds through early May of this year. Dexter and Comet also started to get on a fitness routine as I increased the vigor of our walks. Then we were introduced to a new way of looking at food – good fiber -type carbohydrates in vegetables, Eating selectively anywhere. Drinking a heck of a lot of water. And not requiring crazy exercise regimens. Gone are the days when, like the Navy, our managers (Division Officers) would expect a too-stout Sailor to go to the gym or the track three times a day to get within military standards. I mean, our civilian employer (unless that employer is a fitness gym) is not going to pay me to work out even if I wanted to – all day.
So we got this exercise room put together with mats and dumbbells and a scale. And a computer display so that we watch streaming exercise programs. But who is benefiting most of the work-week from this indoor gym? Dexter. A couple weeks ago when starting to do my exercises, I noticed dust, whitish hair, biscuit crumbs and even a partially chewed bone on the mats. We have been leaving the doors wide open particularly for that room adjacent to the front door. It makes the narrow hall look that much bigger by leaving the door open.
Now I am stationing three five-gallon water bottles across the threshold. And my wife, an incredibly patient woman, has resisted the impulse to tell me to just close the door. According to my training mentor who introduced me to this whole online coaching thing, when I am working out I should have witnesses, both to motivate me – and to motivate them to get fit. I really doubt that this was intended to inspire our dogs. Should I just get a big mirror like they do at the gym? Perhaps one of the fun-house types that make you look incredibly thin. And ten feet tall.
If you are interested in learning more about fitness and healthy eating, I would welcome you connecting with me over Facebook ( https://www.facebook.com/eric.saretsky or the group Saltydawg Fitness), or Instagram: @ericsaretsky